Today I have been Mrs. Jordan Lidh for three years. I am no expert on marriage. If it is possible, I feel like some days I know less about marriage now than I did before I got married. When you decide to be in a forever relationship with a person you never stop learning. You never stop growing. Relationships are messy and they take a lot of work, but this work is worth it. I want to put extra effort into my marriage. I want it to be what God has intended marriage to be, not how the world sees marriage.
I normally would not write about this. Marriage to me is very sacred, and I did not start this blog to talk about how to have a great marriage or give out marriage advice. But it is my anniversary, so today my husband and marriage is on my mind more. I will say one thing about having Abigail and marriage. Children affect marriage. Instead of having the two of you only, you get a little one or two or ten that you have to provide for, love, and raise. These little people you produce take a lot of time and energy. I am constantly reminding myself that my first priority is not my child. She is pretty high up there, but my husband and my marriage must come first. I want her (and our other future children) to know that Jordan and I love them very much, but the love we have for each other is greater. That is how it should be. When the kids grow up and it is just you and the man who chose you all those years ago what will happen? Will you invest more in the marriage or in the kids the marriage made?? I want my children to have a model of biblical marriage they can see everyday. I want our marriage to be one they want for themselves one day.
Marriage is a covenant not a commitment. It is not something to simply choose to walk away from and decide you no longer want it. I made this covenant in front of God and my husband and I want to honor that covenant with all my heart. So while marriage is messy and relationships are hard, I want my marriage to be a picture of Christ and His bride as long as we both shall live.
Tonight we lit our unity candle, the candle that represents our oneness, and sat across from each other at the kitchen table. We took turns reading our wedding vows to each other. It was such a simply thing, but one that meant so much to my heart and spirit. These vows were written from our hearts before we were married, and it was wonderful to go back to that day and relive a little bit of our wedding day again. The day we committed to love each other in front of God, family, and friends. We both knew we would be together long before our wedding day, but February 1, 2014 was the day we united as one and it will forever be a special day to me!