A Reflection on Motherhood

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Your day begins early as you prepare yourself and your family to start the day off right, or at least you try to start it off right but something is bound to get off track. You work hard all day whether it is at home or in an office, and then you have more work to do as the day winds down between picking up everyone’s messes or doing yet another load of laundry. The day is long, oh so long! But you are a mother and deep inside you know this is all worth it. These days will not be forever, and tomorrow will bring a whole lists of new things to do and worries to be had, so today you do your work to the best of your ability. Life is short and having children at home is even shorter, so today mother, treat this life as a blessing that will be short lived and enjoy every messy moment.

The role mothers take on is endless…

  • chef
  • fashion coordinator
  • secretary
  • taxi driver
  • photographer
  • daily planner
  • teacher
  • doctor
  • cuddler
  • discipliner
  • zoo rangler
  • lover
  • fighter
  • maid
  • librarian
  • chorus director

…and that’s not even all of the roles! We wear so many different hats, no wonder our mama brains are like scrambled eggs up there. But each of these roles means the world to our children and our family. They need us to be there through it all as they become the adults God has planned them to be. While it is a headache to be everything to everybody, the good thing is that we are not called to be anything but a child of God, and a mother to these precious children. So often we attach other titles and jobs to ourselves that the world tells us we have to do, but no where does God say we are called to be anything but a mother to these children. So let’s mother them the best we can, and go back to the simple truths of God’s Word and what He has called us to.

Emily and Laura from Risen Motherhood (you can follow them on Instagram @risenmotherhood. They also share a weekly podcast if you are into those!) shared a wonderful tidbit in their Instagram post today. She was asked, “What does the church need to give moms this Mother’s Day?” Her answer goes with exactly the point I am trying to make. She replied, “What moms really need to hear isn’t a burdensome statement about the hugeness of their calling, a heartfelt thanks that can sometimes fall on deaf ears due to guilt, or a list of ways they can do even better in motherhood…What the moms really need, if we are to give them the strength to run the race set before them, is a reminder of who they are and what they have in Christ.” Thanks Emily! What beautiful words and big Truths!! Moms need to be reminded that they are daughters of God himself and in Him they can find rest, hope, faith and love! As moms we must be so plugged into God that He is what makes us function and live. Our children need us to be so in love with God that they see Him through us! On this Mother’s Day let us remember who we are in Christ and what He offers freely to us.

Mothering is hard! Parenting is hard! But God has given us these children to raise to honor Him, so let us run our race faithfully. May you always be reminded that you are worthy and have a purpose in this life. As you change bed sheets and wipe dirty faces for the twentieth time that day may you remember that this to is God’s perfect plan. Motherhood was created by God to bless families from the beginning of the world. Without mothers children would not learn fully to love, care, and share emotionally with others. Mothers and women have specific roles that fathers and men cannot fill for God made us each unique. So mother your children as God has so given us the ability to. Mother them knowing that you are a loved and blessed child of the one true King. Mother them knowing that soon these children will be mothering and fathering children of their own.

Today may all mothers, grandmothers, and soon-to-be mothers all be blessed in a special way. May we always be thankful for the mothers in our own lives whether biological or not. Mothers are special gifts not to be taken for granted. And to all the mama’s out there – you can do this!!! Happy Mother’s Day!

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In honor of Mother’s Day here is a picture of when I became a Mommie!!

How Time Flies

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Today marks one year since I posted the first blog about Abigail and shared our story on here. A whole year since “Hush Little Baby” was written. I was reading over this post earlier today and I am so glad I started this blog. I was scared to at first because I was not sure what to write and how to share our story. Abigail is an odd bird. I wanted people to be encouraged by her story of the unknown. I wanted to share Abigail’s joy and love with the world. But I did not want to come across that we were wallowing in misery over here. Because we are not. Life is wonderful and I would not trade my baby with anyone. She is perfect in every way!! But I have been encouraged and have found hope through writing. It is a great way for me to process all my thoughts, and I am delighted now to share with my readers. In the year since I have been writing I have written 26 posts and over 1300 people have visited this page!! What a praise!!! I do not tell you that brag about myself, but to say I have dreams and goals that this blog will hopefully touch more and more people.

Since writing my first post so much has changed and yet, so little has changed. We are still in the midst of the unknown. (In the Midst of the Unknown) We still do not have any answers as to why Abigail is how she is. Abigail still cannot sit or walk. But my goodness, have we seen this girl improve!!! She is learning new things everyday. If you have not seen her video of all her new ‘tricks’ you can check it out here, on my Facebook page under videos. But she now rolls from side to side, and can flip over when she wants to. She is talking more and more and can say mama and dada. She loves to squeal in happiness and is getting pretty good at mimicking you. She also eats like a champ which is a big deal for us!

This almost two-year old is not the same baby as a year ago. She loves people and is very social! She works so hard in therapy and at home as she gets stronger everyday. She plays with her toys and learns something new everyday I swear. She sees and focuses on things in her environment and reaches out for people and objects that catch her attention. She hates being left by anyone, but she can play by herself and roll over to get her toys. Such a difference from the nine month old who barely did anything. She just was not interested in playing or interacting. But now she barely stops to nap.

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Abigail one year ago, eleven months old. That hair!!

Today has been a blog in review kind of day as I have gone through my posts and reminisced. I am so glad I have these to remember my thoughts and feelings during these first few years of Abigail’s life. So many of these blogs still hold true. Abigail is still “my pint-sized teacher” as she teaches me new things everyday. She still cracks us up like in “our joy” and through her God is still learning life lessons like in “the big picture“. But my favorite blog is still “my kind of normal“. Everyone has their own schedule, their own tricks and favorite things to do because we are all unique and every child is unique. What works for me would never work for your child and visa versa. I would have no idea what to do with a “normal” toddler. They are too fast for me. I am used to a child who does not move, but you know what? My arms are stronger than they have ever been!

A year of blogging has been amazing and I am excited to see where this blog goes and how it grows. I love sharing our story and how Abigail is progressing and growing into a beautiful little girl. My little baby I just was holding in the hospital is turning two in just three weeks. Oh how time flies! I want to treasure every single moment with my daughter because soon those sweet snuggles and pure innocence will be replaced. Her sweet face touches will become less and less. So before time takes away my sweet baby I will love on her all I can. Thank you for loving through the delay with me!!!

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What is in a Name?

Picking out your child’s name is tough. You have to think about so many factors – does it sound good with your last name? Do you know anyone you don’t like with that name? Does the monogram look cute? Will they get picked on their whole life for this name? Do you name the baby after someone in the family? The list goes on and on. There are books and websites dedicated to helping you pick the best name for your child. How do you pick the perfect name?

When we found out we were pregnant picking out a name was one of the first things we did. We had to pick out the girl name and the boy name. The boy name was

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Our gender announcement!

a lot harder, and I still do not know if I even love it. We knew our son’s middle name would be Jordan after my husband, but we were leaning towards Asher for the first name. Apparently we like names that begin with ‘A’. As for the girl’s name, we knew it instantly without even debating. We both loved the name Abigail. I am not sure why, but it was decided 100% Abigail would be our daughter’s name if we had a girl.

Abigail Paige Lidh. Her name has so much meaning behind it, and I pray she lives up to her name as she grows and matures. Jordan allowed me to pick the middle name Paige. I have always loved it, and it adds so much to her name as I will explain. First, Abigail means ‘her father’s delight’. Well of course she is Jordan’s delight. He loves her so much and she gets so excited when he walks in the room! Those two have a very special relationship and I love it. But then there is the Abigail in the Bible. A strong, wise lady who served David and his men in the face of near destruction for her and her family. A servant through and through. Paige also means to serve. That is what I want for Abigail, for her to have a servant’s heart, and for her to love others and serve them selflessly. The world teaches you to look out for number one, but if we would serve others and treat them as people who God loves then we could make a difference in people’s lives.

And I would be amiss to not mention my favorite part of Abigail’s name – her monogram. APL or apple as I like to say, for she is the apple of our eye. She will always be as our first baby. But as I was reading Psalm one day when I was pregnant I came across this verse. “Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings.” Ps. 17:8, NIV. I knew instantly that wImage (2)as to be Abigail’s life verse. I want her to have an intimate relationship with God when the time comes, and to find shelter in Him and not in the things of this world. I want her to be in awe of the One who made her, and trusts Him fully for all things. Such simple, life-changing truths that even I wish I would apply more often. These are the things I pray for my daughter’s life.

Abigail Paige Lidh. There are so many emotions, prayers, and thoughts wrapped up in that one name. It is one of my favorites! And I am so glad that there is more to her name than just what was written on her birth certificate. Do you have a specific reason for naming your child what you named them? I love hearing naming stories!! Please comment and share below!

About Me

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For those who need to see hope in this world.

For those who want encouragement in parenting.

For those who want honesty about living with a child with special needs.

This blog offers a positive view on children with special needs; written for special needs moms, stay at home moms, and those who are interested in my daughter’s progress. If you love inspirational writings, adorable toddler stories, and a heart felt love for children than this is the blog for you! The posts on this site include stories of my daughter’s progress, things I have learned from being her mother, and life with a special needs toddler because she is the inspiration behind all I write. The journey with our daughter started when she was two months old. It has been an almost two year process of tests, therapy and tears and we still are not sure why causes our daughter’s developmentally delay. This blog tells our story of the day-to-day life as we discover how to love each other through the delay.

Welcome to our family! My name is Heather. My husband, Jordan and I were married February 1, 2014 and we had our beautiful daughter, Abigail in May 2015. My husband works hard providing for us at his retail job while I stay at home with our joyful little girl. She keeps me busy between occupational, physical, and speech therapy. We live in Atlanta, Georgia, and love spending time as a family. We are active in our local church and are Christians who love God and have an intimate relationship with Him. My prayer for this blog is that it would inspire you to love others more and encourage you in ways you could never imagine. Life is hard, and we are often dealt cards we were not expecting, but those hard, unexpected things are sometimes the greatest blessings. That is what Abigail is to my husband and I, a great blessing! Abigail gives us encounters everyday that we treasure with all our hearts.

So please, if this blog sounds like a good read, subscribe to my posts! Send me an e-mail with comments or questions, or find me on social media. You can find all the links on the left side of my home page. I want to tell our story and help others with theirs. Thank-you for stopping by, and hopefully we will talk to each other soon!

One Day at a Time

I write a lot about the positive side of raising Abigail because often that is how I feel. I love her and her little personality. I would not change Abigail for anything, but I am not as strong as some may think I am. Often, people will comment about my faith or my strength or my endurance as I write about our life, but often I feel like I do not have any of those things. Here, we simply take one day at a time because we just do not know what tomorrow will hold.

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Abigail around two months old – about the time we first learned something was not quite right.

That is hard for me. I am a planner. I love lists and schedules. Part of me wants to already be looking for a school for Abigail or planning our vacation for next year (this year is already planned). That’s me. My husband says I plan way too much and way too early. He describes himself of flying by the seat of his pants but in a controlled way. He was that guy in school who wrote his paper the night before it was due and then made an A on it. I was not that person. I loved syllabus day because that night I would lay out all my syllabi and make a semester long schedule and calendar of when I would start every project or paper. Everything was done with days, if not weeks in advance of the deadline. I do not work well under pressure! I tell you all this to show you that this new life is not my favorite.

Babies mess up schedules. I usually plan out in my head how my day will go hour by hour. Even though it does not affect anyone but me if things change, I just like having order. But I have learned that babies do not live on schedules. That’s a tough one for me to learn. You never know when Abigail will have a day when she will not nap so there goes my hour I had planned to clean or organize the house. My ‘perfect’ made up schedule gets ‘ruined’ a lot. It used to bother me more than it should, but just the other day our plans got changed last-minute and my husband said that I was handling it a lot better than I used to! That was a huge compliment for me!! I am improving.

But all this is just petty worries that I am learning to dust off and move on with. There are some moments where it all just hits me that we have no idea what the future holds. There are some moments where I completely doubt myself and my ability to mother. There are some moments where I am jealous as I watch other two-year-olds with their mothers. There are moments when I fear, worry, and analyze way too much. There is no book that tells you how to parent. There definitely is no book that tells you what to do when you hear the worse about your child. That something is not right with them. One day at a time is all I can do sometimes.

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My family taking it one day at a time – enjoying some frisbee golf at the park!

We met with our Babies Can’t Wait counselor this past Thursday. Babies Can’t Wait is a program that helps special needs parents work with the local school system to prepare your child for an easier transition into school once they reach that age. She was explaining to me about the process of getting Abigail in preschool in the next few years. Then she asked the dreaded question I try not to think about “has anyone mentioned to you about getting a wheelchair and other equipment?” Yes, a wheelchair. I know that’s a huge possibility in our future, but no one in the medical field has ever asked that before and it broke my heart. I want my baby to walk and explore and be able to get around on her own. I know amazing people in wheelchairs, and I know it would not be the end of the world if Abigail was placed in one as she gets ready to go to school. But it is the thought that my baby would once again be seen for what she could not do rather than what she could do.

One day at a time. That is what I remind myself when the fears of the future prevail. Today Abigail can wiggle and twist all on her on. Tomorrow she could stand. We simply do not know what she is capable of, but I have seen that child do things I would never thought she could do. Yes, therapy helps her a lot. Yes, I work with her some at home. But she does a lot of things all on her own. She is learning and growing everyday. So no, I do not think I am strong or even capable of mothering this stubborn blonde-headed baby but I know that Abigail is strong and we will continue to fight for her each and every day!


“Anxiety happens when you think you have to figure out everything all at once. Breathe. You’re strong. You got this. Take it day by day.” – Karen Salmansohn

Mother/Daughter Bond

Jordan always wanted to have a girl. Even before we decided to have a child, he wanted a girl. He says it is because he has been around guys his whole life, but I think he just wanted a little look a like princess to dote on. And he got exactly that! When we first found out we were pregnant we were deciding on names. The girl’s name was not even a decision really. We both knew instantly we would name our daughter Abigail if the baby were a girl. And the day we found out it was a girl I thought my husband would burst of excitement (well as excited as Jordan can be). We were supposed to do a small gender reveal with our families, but in all my excitement I let the cat out of the bag instantly to my mom, so everyone knew it was a girl without all the pomp and circumstance.

A girl. At this point I really did not have much of an opinion. I knew nothing about babies (and still don’t), so it did not really matter to me whether we had a girl or a boy. Part of me wanted a boy because in my head a big brother should be the way it is. I am very traditional, and I grew up with a big brother. But a girl. Even though I am a girl I do not know much about hair, fashion, make-up, the latest songs or even what is the ‘in’ thing right now. I just never have been interested in that kind of thing. I knew our poor daughter would miss out on a lot of things that other moms might teach by example. But my mom never did any of those ‘girly’ things and I never felt left out, so I figured maybe our daughter would be okay too.

Then Abigail came into the world and I held her for the first time. They placed all seven pounds of her on my chest. Those eyes just looked at me trying to figure me all out. My baby girl. Abigail never cried or made any noises at all. She just laid there with those big eyes staring straight into mine. I will never forget that moment. Some people may say that moment I was connected with my daughter. But the one thing that has bonded me to her like never before has been staying at home with her. These last few months have given us a bond like nothing I could ever describe. I have learned a lot about her, and I have learned a lot about myself. I have experienced the mother/daughter bond, and I love it!

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First time I held my baby!

I dream about having tea parties and playing dress up. I want to make a million Pinterest crafts with Abigail, and teach her how to count. I want to have matching aprons so we can cook dinner for Daddy together. I dream about a lot of things. And for Abigail these may always be dreams. We are not sure what her future will hold. But we still have fun in our own way. We love to go on walks and ‘talking.’ Abigail loves to swing and play in the mirror. She’s a great shopping buddy. She is excellent at dropping all her toys off her high chair tray. And she is the best giggler in the world!! So for now we have fun doing these things, and maybe one day my mommie/daughter dreams will play out and we will have fun doing those things too. But I have learned that having a little girl is so much fun!!

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Attempting to play Candy Land. Yes, it’s a princess version and yes she just played with the cards. But she also won.

Everyone talks about the father/daughter bond, and I know Abigail and Jordan have their own relationship that Jordan treasures, but I am not Jordan so I cannot write for him. All I can tell you is that there is a very special relationship between mothers and daughters as well. My hope and my prayer is to simply be the woman of God that Abigail needs to model for her as she grows. I want to be her inspiration and her mentor. I do hope she has teachers and leaders in her life that guide her as well. She will need them so much! But I want to be her main teacher. I want her to watch me as I follow God. That is a steep calling for me, but as Abigail’s mother I do not expect anything less of myself.

What is Excellent?

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In Philippians, Paul instructs the believers to approve what is excellent. Not what is good, but excellent. So often I fail to reflect on the good much less what is excellent, but as I stopped and read that verse over and over this week in my study I could not help but wonder why those words stood out to me. The excellent. When Jesus came over to Mary and Martha’s house to eat one day Martha got upset that Mary was not helping her but instead she was just sitting at Jesus’ feet apparently not doing much. Jesus gently rebuked Martha and reminded her that Mary was doing the excellent thing – listening to Him. There it is again the excellent, not the good. Jesus told His disciples He came to give life, and not just any old life but the abundant life. Over and over the Bible lists examples that God is not a good or just good enough kind of god, He is the God of abundance and overflow. He is the God of the most excellent way.

God knows we have a tendency to dwell on the bad. To dwell on what worries us and what has gone wrong with our day. We are people who lean toward the negative.
I would even claim to be a positive person but I still worry and think about the worse outcomes at times. But He tells us again and again to find all we need in Him. Do not fear, do not worry, do not rely on ourself. Why are these instructions in the Bible so much? Because we so often forget and worry, and do not trust the God of everything.

I often struggle with trusting God. With Abigail it is easy to dwell on the bad and the what ifs. What if it was my fault she is like she is? What if I had not taken that medicine while I was pregnant or been induced for convenience sake? What if it is a genetic issue with Jordan or myself? What if she never walks? You see, there is a lot of bad to dwell on.
There are also a lot of cannots in Abigail’s life. She cannot sit up. She cannot talk. She cannot feed herself. She cannot stand. She cannot do a lot of things. But I hate looking at these! These things do not define my child, they are simply a list for people to use to determine where Abigail is in life. But Abigail is not a list of what she cannot do.

My Abigail can make anyone smile. My Abigail can giggle and make you laugh too. My Abigail can drink from a straw, and has done so since she was six months old. My Abigail can tolerate tummy time now. My Abigail can clean out a basket of toys and make a mess in about 30 seconds. My Abigail can clap joyously. My Abigail can find her nose, ears, and hair. My Abigail is beautiful!

It is so easy to be worried and distraught over Abigail’s situation. It is easy to say what she cannot do. It is easy to think things will never improve or change. But I choose to make the harder choice. I choose to see what Abigail can do. I choose to have hope that her improvement will only continue. I choose to be my daughter’s biggest cheerleader and her strongest fighter. I choose today and all the days of Abigail’s life to keep working with her, keep making her stronger, and keep showing her that she can do these things. I choose the more excellent way.

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Being the mother to this beautiful, perfect little girl is my more excellent way!

Yes, she will probably always have to work harder than other children her age to do the same things, but I think Abigail will have a fierce little personality that will be hard to contend with. She will be a fighter, and she will know what hard work and determination are. She is already stubborn and independent, and these qualities will make her into a little lady who will make a difference in this world.

So my prayer for my child, myself and for my readers is that we would all see what is good and excellent and right in this world and in the people we encounter everyday. That we would not define people by what they can’t do or what they can’t give, but we would see what is good in people and desire only good for them. I pray we can all be fighters in a world where it is easier to sit back and watch. I pray we will intentionally love others and show them there is a battle to be fought, and that there is only one winning side to be on. May we be able to approve what is excellent in our lives!