A Trip to Chili’s

How do you explain to a two-year-old about special needs? How do you explain to her that a little girl her own age cannot do the things you can do because her legs don’t work quite right? We came face to face with this situation this weekend, and I have been pondering these things myself.

My mother-in-law and her husband took Abigail and me out to dinner Saturday night just so we could get out of the house for a bit. We had been home for over two days and I was going a little stir crazy, so we all packed up and went to Chili’s down the road from our house. Well apparently everyone in town was stir crazy or didn’t want to cook (or couldn’t because they didn’t have power) because everyone was at Chili’s. So we sat with another family that came in before us in the waiting area for about 15 minutes. What a 15-minute wait that was!

The family consisted of a young mother, her two children (a little girl we soon discovered was only two months older than Abigail and her little brother who was about 6 months I am guessing), and the mother’s parents. They were a sweet family and we instantly started talking about the snow and road conditions and power outages. My mother-in-law was holding Abigail, and I was across from them in the other seat. They were sitting right beside the little girl and her mother.

The little girl and Abigail were having a staring contest. You see Abigail loves watching children. I think they fascinate her. The little girl finally got brave enough to ask Susan (my mother-in-law) what Abigail’s name was, so Susan told her and asked her name. She was the cutest little girl with light up rain galoshes on. Susan asked her how old she was and she said three, so the mother had to chime in and say she was only two. We couldn’t believe that she was Abigail’s age. Her mother said she was in the 97th percentile. Abigail is in the 10th, so you can only imagine what the size difference between them was. I explained to the adults that Abigail had special needs, so that might be one reason she seemed so tiny. Well the little girl couldn’t comprehend Abigail was two just like her. She kept saying she was only one, and Susan kept telling her, ‘no she’s two just like you.’

Well everything was going peachy until the little girl asked if Abigail could get down and play with her. Susan told the little girl that Abigail couldn’t leave her lap. Her mother tried to tell her that Abigail’s legs don’t work like hers and of course the why question kept coming. You could tell everyone was getting a little tense with not knowing what to say. Then the little girl asked if Abigail could sit beside her. Of course another round of ‘no’s’ and ‘why not’s’ commenced. So Susan finally told her she could play with her but Abigail would have to sit in her lap. I knew this was going to go poorly the moment that little girl stepped towards Abigail. Abigail loves looking at kids, but she does not like kids in her bubble much less touching her. Well that sweet little girl so lovingly held Abigail’s hands. It truly was the cutest thing, and I wished I could have taken a picture. But all the touching was way too much for Abigail.

I calmly got up from my seat anticipating Abigail’s freak out, and it came quickly. Her bottom lip quivered (a sure sign tears were coming). I scooped Abigail up, and the mother was like did my daughter do anything? “No, not a thing. She was the sweetest to Abigail, but Abigail cannot tolerate children. I am so sorry.” The little girl’s face crumbled. I told her she did nothing wrong and that Abigail was going to be okay. I had to walk away to calm Abigail down and when I got back the family had been seated. I told my mother-in-law everything was good. Abigail was back to laughing and dancing to the holiday music in no time. And when we left we stopped by the family’s table and wished them a goodnight. The little girl waved good-bye, so I knew she was okay too.

But goodness, what a situation! It really was not a big deal probably to anyone else, but those 10 minutes rocked my world. This is my life. No one knows how to react when you say special needs. I felt so awful for that little girl and her family. I know they had no idea what to say or do to explain Abigail. I was no help either. Looking back I should have taken Abigail and showed the girl how Abigail’s legs don’t work right. I should have held her and had a ‘dance’ party in my lap while the little girl stood beside us. There are 15 different things I could have done now looking back. But I sat there and watched this family meet a special needs little girl for the first time with no explanation.

I know it’s not a big deal. They probably won’t even remember us tomorrow, but I will never forget this. I know situations like this will come again. Children will ask questions, and I will have to answer to them and their families. I will have to explain why at two a little girl cannot walk or talk or even sit. I don’t know if I will have all the answers, but I hope to help and encourage as we go. Explaining special needs to a two-year-old is tough, but I hope that little girl stays as loving and sweet as she was that night. And I pray that one day Abigail will accept a sweet handhold from a fellow pier. That little girl’s hand in my child’s hand tonight meant the world to me. I know it was brief, but it shows bridges can be gapped and my daughter can be accepted. Such a simple thing, but such a huge Christmas blessing – a simple hand hold from a sweet little two-year-old girl at a Chili’s restaurant.

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Her Stubbornness

Stubbornness runs in our family. My grandparents were and still are entrepreneurs, making glass wind chimes now for over 40 years. Jordan’s grandparents are still active and going and his grandfather still works 8-5 at his job at 72 years old. The stubbornness shows itself in our parents as well. And goodness does it show up in us! We can never decide on who is more stubborn between Jordan and me because we are too stubborn to admit who is more stubborn. We are a mess! So then you have two very stubborn people make a baby, and guess what? That baby is as stubborn as both parents put together.

Stubbornness is often seen as a bad thing, and often it is. It prevents you from seeing the other side of the argument.  It keeps you from listening to wise council. It stops you from enjoying things you could otherwise enjoy. But as stubborn as Abigail is, I am very thankful for that quality in her. Sure it is annoying when you try to tell her no and she just keeps doing what she was doing while laughing in your face. Sure I would like her to actually do what I say instead of what Abigail wants to do all the time. And sure we butt heads a lot and I get very annoyed with her. But that stubbornness in her is what makes her a little miracle child.

Let me explain. So our journey all began at Abigail’s two month check up. Everything was great and we had a perfectly healthy little baby in our arms, except the doctor told us he was very concerned with her vision. We knew she had wonky eyes, but we figured all newborns had poor vision, well apparently not this bad. Here are some pictures from Abigail’s first year. You can see how she constantly looked up.

We saw two eye doctors and one neurologist at this point and none of them could explain Abigail’s vision. But by 18 months her eyes had corrected themselves with no help from anyone. Her eyes simply came down by themselves. We worked on some tracking exercises and things like that with her OT, but that’s it. Her eyes still get cross eyed and a little shaky today so that is why Abigail wears her glasses, but compared to how they looked when she was 3 months old her eyes look perfect.

Her stubbornness is vital for Abigail because without her motivation to want to move and play and be little Miss Independent she would not be improving. Yes, her therapists are amazing and I am beyond grateful for each of them. Yes, working with her at home helps. But it is Abigail who wants to pull herself around. It is Abigail who wanted to start feeding herself. We tried for almost two years to make that kid feed herself and she never would hold a scrap of food, and then one day I just laid some goldfish on her tray to feed her and she picked them up and put them in her mouth like she was a feeding expert. Until Abigail wants to do something she does not do it. I know she can get herself around and I try to make her pull herself if I just go in to the next room. But she refuses to move until she wants to.

I truly believe if Abigail has a will she has a way. If she is willing to work and move and play then she does. She has shown that these last few months. Her awareness and wanting to move around has come out of no where and now she scoots and pulls and plays like never before. I still do not know where the motivation to move came from, but I wish I knew! But when the day comes for her to be ready to stand on those wobbly little legs of her I know she will be stubborn enough to figure out what she needs to. I always tell people that for being one of the most dependent toddlers in the world, Abigail is the most independent little thing you will ever meet. I know that spells trouble for Jordan and me as she gets older, but for now I love that she is a little stubborn, independent little blonde headed ball of motivation.

 

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A Musing Mother

It happened again. We were in the waiting room of our doctor’s office waiting for Abigail’s eyes to dilate so we could go back to see the doctor. Abigail was in my lap eating goldfish and watching all the other children running around. Me and her are good people watchers. One particular father was having issues keeping track of his son. The little boy kept wanting to run away and run straight out the door, so the dad kept running around after him only for the son to escape again. At one point the dad sat down across from us and tried to offer his son his own goldfish, to try to entice him to be still for a minute I am sure. The dad made a passing comment that made me cringe inside. He turned to his son and said, “Why can’t you be calm like that little girl?”

It is not the first time that comment has been made about Abigail. Obviously, she is calmer than a typical two-year-old. I mean she can’t move for goodness sake. And this was not our first rodeo in a crowded doctor’s office full of typical kids. So you can imagine when parents are chasing after running toddlers, and trying to keep their young children occupied in a boring office that seeing my child just sitting in my lap calmly chowing down on her snacks could easily make you jealous. I mean selfishly does not every parent want an Abigail who does not move and get into things and all the normal toddler things that toddlers do? A selfish parent wants an Abigail, but a parent with any bit of love for their child would never wish this on their child.

I wish I could tell that father that he really does not want his son to be calm like Abigail. I wish I had the time to explain our story, but a crowded doctor’s office is not the place. That dad wouldn’t care. If anything we would just get all the pity stares from everyone when I explained why Abigail was sitting in my lap and not running around. We receive enough pity stares already, so we do not need those either. My favorite response from strangers are the ones when they comment on how cute Abigail is, or how her pink glasses are adorable, or how blonde her hair is. I just want to stop and thank those lovely strangers for taking time to talk to us and to see my girl for who she is and not what she can’t do. I know these comments will decrease and the pity stares will increase as Abigail gets bigger and we actually have to use her new adaptive stroller or wheelchair more. Kids in wheelchairs are different and our society does not like different. Right now that only thing that sets Abigail apart from a typical toddler (at least from what a stranger can see) are her glasses and we get so many comments about those!

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Abigail’s newest wheels – the adaptive stroller. We haven’t used it a lot but I think when we do this thing will get some attention.

“Why can’t you be calm like her.” I won’t ever forget that small comment. I would not wish any parent to have a child with special needs. It is a whole different world (that I am only beginning to learn about) that comes with struggles, heartaches, and a dash of hope. While I am thankful for our journey and I could not be more blessed to be a mom of a special needs child, I want more than anything for Abigail to be normal. I want her to be able to be the independent child that she thinks she is. I want her to be able to walk and run and just be a kid. I want her to play pretend with her baby dolls and help my bake a cake. I want her to talk my ear off in the backseat and tell me what a cat says. I want her to learn her ABCs and sing made up songs to me before nap time. Oh these are just some smalls dreams I want. I know she is progressing daily, and for every baby step we just cannot believe it. As long as she is moving forward we know there is hope that one day she could do all these things.

What I would say for any parent of young children out there is that I know the days are long. I know you are tired and maybe even burnt out. I know toddlers are crazy! I know you have amazing days and then you have some horrible days. But please don’t take these days for granted. Be thankful for them being toddlers. Be thankful they are learning how to be little people and how this big world works. Protect them, love them and be patient with them. Soak in every silly song, every kiss for a boo-boo, and the sound of those little feet running towards you. They grow so fast and they need you more than ever right now. And if you happen to know a parent of a special needs child, or just see one out and about please do not offer the pity stare. Just say hey like you would any other mom. Tell them their child is beautiful and get your child to wave at them. You will make that parent’s day I assure you. All a special needs parent wants is the same thing you want – someone to stop and give us a smile and say hey I notice all you’re doing and you’re rocking it!

And to all mom’s that is what I leave you with – you are rocking it! Keep going moms! Drink your coffee, take a shower, do whatever you need to do for you and then love those babies with all your heart. We are in this together, and together we can do this thing called life. So find some mom friends and encourage some mom friends and love some mom friends this week. We need each other!

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HOME

Home is where the heart is.

Home is where I am with you.

Home is where your story begins.

It’s good to be home.

There is no place like home.

Home Sweet Home

There are hundreds of different quotes about home when you search on Google or Pinterest. It’s hard to pick just one. There’s a sign on Etsy I’ve been wanting to buy for our office that reads, “It’s so good to be home.” Home: it means so many things to so many different people. If you surveyed a hundred people and asked them what home was to them you might get a hundred different answers. Some answers would be positive and some would be negative depending on their history and what experiences they have gone through.

I have been blessed to grow up in a good home. My mom and dad raised me in a home of love and support. My dad worked and my mom stayed home with my brother and myself. The thing I remember most about growing up is family dinners (we always sat around the table together to eat the dinner my mom fixed is every night) and Friday nights we always went out. It was usually something simple like eating at a family restaurant and playing putt putt or going bowling. But I still remember those evenings out all these years later.

I moved out of my parents’ house after I graduated high school and lived on campus at my college for 5 years. 3.5 of those years were spent in the girls’ dorm and 1.5 of those years were spent married to my college sweet heart. For the first 4 months of our marriage we actually lived in the girls’ dorm because I was the resident director. It was out little joke that my husband got married and moved in with 60 girls. But the apartment was completely separated from the girls’ rooms and the only thing Jordan shared with the residents was the front door.

Then my husband and I moved down to an in campus apartment and continued to work at our alma mater for a year before having our baby girl. We then transitioned to a mobile home owned by my grandparents until we could find a more permanent residence. This permanent residence ended up being my husband’s childhood home. His mother was remarried in September of last year and we moved into her house in October. We were wanting to move to the area anyways so the timing could not be more perfect and we did not even have to house hunt. It was a blessing for us for sure!

So now we have been in this home for right at a year now and it made me think about home. Not a house where we live but home. I asked Jordan what he thinks home is and he said wherever you and Abigail are. It made me think of Lilo and Stitch when Stitch says, “Ohana, Ohana means family and family means no one gets left behind or forgotten.” My family is my home. We may move every year to a new home, but if I’m with my family then I am home.

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Moments after getting to the apartment from the hospital with our newborn baby. We were home and a family of three!!

I like making my house pretty. I love waking the aisles of Hobby Lobby and dreaming on Pinterest about what projects to do next. I already have plans for every room of the house and whether we ever get to them or not I will keep dreaming about redecorating. I also enjoy a clean home. No, my home will never be spotless. It will always be a bit cluttered with way too many things and the table will always have yesterday’s mail on it, but I like knowing the house is clean. Like bathrooms are wiped down, floors have been vacuumed and mopped. It feels good to live in a clean house. And while I spend a lot of time each week cleaning, doing laundry and decluttering my house it still isn’t home unless my family is there. I am very much a home body and so is my husband. On any given evening or weekend we will be home watching tv while Abigail wiggles around on the floor. And I am glad we like being home together.

Home is a hard thing to define. It is not about the physically house you live in and how nice or not so nice it is. We lived in an old trailer for a year filled with roaches and water leaks, but we still called it home because that’s where my family was. I am thankful to have a nice house now, but no matter where God leads us as long as my husband is with me I will be home! I would say kids too but hopefully one day we will be empty nesters and our children will make homes of their own with their spouses.

I want my home to be a place of peace and rest. I want my family to want to come home because it is a shelter from the crazy world. I want them to be able to find contentment at home. I want our home to be a place of love – unconditional and sacrificial love. I want our family to grow, not only in number but spiritually and emotionally as well. I want us to be unified and open with each other. I want this home to be welcoming to others – to anyone who steps over our threshold to feel relaxed and welcomed in our home. I want this home to be filled with laugher and memories. I want our home to be led by Jesus first and then I want us to follow Him whole heartedly. I want Jordan and I to grow in love and wisdom as we raise our children in this house. And I want our children to want to come home and know they are loved in this home.

Home is…

A little girl’s laughter after being tickled by her Daddy.

A kiss goodbye as a husband leaves for work.

A gentle look from a mother as her child plays on the floor.

A child’s curiosity over some new object she found.

A husband relaxing on the couch.

A wife calling everyone to the dinner table.

A family snuggle to end the day.

A home is…

That stain on the carpet from a child kicking over your drink.

Running around in your underwear as you get everyone ready.

Burning the toast because you got distracted playing.

Having too much on the to do list but still choosing to play or nap with the baby.

Making up with your husband after telling him to pick up after himself for the 100th time.

Quiet evenings with your spouse when the baby goes down to sleep.

When the tiredness sets in because it’s midnight and that baby won’t go to sleep.

Changing countless diapers and keeping up with poops.

Home is a thousand little moments that make life perfect.

Life isn’t always great and happy and lovely every single moment. I get tired, frustrated and worried, but with my family beside me I know we will face all life holds together. My family is my safe spot. They are my home sweet home.

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How Abigail Learns

We began occupational and physical therapy when Abigail was just 5 months old. At that point we had no idea what we were in for. We had no idea how our journey would proceed. We simply knew we had a little baby girl who the doctors were telling us was way behind in muscle tone. Abigail was our normal and still is. We had no idea a five month old shouldn’t be doing these things. Thankfully we had some great therapists who helped us learn what we should be doing with Abigail to help strengthen her little muscles.

Abigail has always been progressing forward but at the slowest rate you could ever imagine. The last time we went to see our neurologist she asked how Abigail had been doing. I was so excited to tell her about all of Abigail’s progress in the months we hadn’t seen her. But putting it in words seemed so dismal. “Well she can kinda roll over now and she is making more noises.” It just didn’t sound that impressive, but if she could just live with Abigail for a few days you can see her huge strides of improvement. But to strangers Abigail is still a two year old who can’t sit, stand, walk or talk.

So how does Abigail learn? How does she get stronger? Repetition. Repetition. Repetition. We have been doing the same things with her from the beginning it feels like. Sometimes things click right away. It only took her a couple of times to learn how to fist bump and wave bye-bye. Teaching her a new sign for sign language usually only takes a few times as well. Now she does not correlate that the eat sign means she is hungry, but if you ask her if she wants to eat she does the right sign so we are getting there. But feeding herself has taken 18 months. We have tried everything, and then one day out of the blue last week she just picked up her goldfish and ate it perfectly by herself. I am not sure why she catches on to some things instantly and other things she still does not get even though we have been working with her for months.

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Either way, we have to be intentional with Abigail. And slow. You cannot ask Abigail to do something and then walk away because she did not do it. Chances are she will do it as you turn your back. Her processing time is slow. So it takes her a minute to wave bye when you tell her to. You just have to give her a chance to listen and process what you said. I like this about Abigail because it has taught me slow down. I am a rush, rush, rush kind of person. Having Abigail has taught me to pause now and then.

Abigail is a smart cookie. I think my husband put it best. Abigail is more and less than meets the eye. Let me explain. When a stranger first looks at Abigail he or she probably thinks she is a normal child. Then I tell them that she has special needs and cannot sit, walk, talk, etc. So then Abigail becomes a special needs child who cannot do anything in their minds. But she is so much more than her disabilities. Sure she cannot sit up on her own, but if you ask her to dance, point, find her belly, or laugh she can follow your instructions perfectly. She understands what people around her are saying, and I swear she can sense people’s emotions. She definitely knows when Mama is leaving and her physical therapists has told me multiple times what an amazing little sense of humor she has. Abigail is pretty fun to get to know and everyone who has spent more than 10 minutes with her just loves her!

Abigail’s processing time may be slower than others, she may not be able to physically compete with another toddler her age, and she cannot communicate with words, but everyday she is learning and growing in her own way. At five months old Abigail barely even cared about the environment around her. She could care less about toys or food or anything really. But to see where she is today, even from where she was a year ago is amazing. She loves her toys and gets so excited when her therapists brings out her big bag of them now. She is ‘talking’ up a storm and is wiggling everywhere. Her head circumference is in the 94 percent tile (her weight is only in the 10th) and we always joke about her huge head. But maybe it is just holding all those smart brains up there. I love watching her learn and I cannot wait to teach her more!

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Five Prayers for My Daughter

Abigail’s future is a blank slate, and our hopes for her probably look different than an average two year old’s parents’ dreams would be. While most parents pray that their toddlers grow up to be influential, honorable citizens we are over here just hoping her legs will one day work and she will walk. But even though we have no idea what Abigail’s future holds for her I still have five specific prayers for her that are constantly running through my head at any given moment. But I especially pray these prayers over her as she sleeps. There is just something special about sleeping children that makes you know that good things will come.

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Announcing we were having a girl – our Christmas present that year!

1.) I pray she is a servant. I know that’s a weird one, but it’s why we named her Abigail Paige. Her name has servant written all over it, and I only pray she lives up (or should I say down?) to her name. There was an Abigail in the Bible. She saved her husband and family by serving David and being humble in the future king’s presence. And Paige literally means ‘one who serves.’ I want Abigail to be a servant in a world that scorns that idea. I want her to seek humility and serve all she comes in contact with. Oh Lord, let her have a servant’s heart.

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Working hard and getting stronger everyday!

2) I pray for physical and emotional strength for Abigail. She is such a motivated little thing and is so strong in her own way. I pray her strength allows her to go a long ways in life. I pray her little body continues to get stronger day by day. Those muscles are our biggest problems and I think they will continue to get stronger as we continue to work with her. But not only physical strength, but Abigail will need emotional strength too. She’s going to have to overcome a lot as she gets older. I’m sure kids will stare at her or even say things to her as she gets older and goes to school. She has the possibility of being in a wheelchair her whole life. That’s prime staring material. And I know as she becomes more and more aware she will realize that kids are running around and playing and she cannot physically keep up with them. Oh she will need lots of prayers for strength and determination as she conquers all these things.

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Even when she looks different than everyone else, she is still beautiful!

3) I also pray that Abigail remembers she is beautiful and perfect just the way God made her. I’m not sure why God made her so weird, and why her body doesn’t work like normal. But she is still perfect and sweet and I pray she doesn’t look at all she can’t do or compare herself to others. She has so much personality and she can do so much but she just has to remember that. I pray Jordan and I always encourage her to be happy in her own skin and that she is beautiful, smart and important just he way she is.

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This is one of those pictures to put in Abigail’s senior yearbook, but look at that happiness!

4) Abigail has always had such a joyful little personality. She is our sunshine because she brightens up the room. Our physical therapist always says she has an amazing sense of humor. And her laughter is contagious. I pray that this joy sticks with her throughout life. So many people lose their joy as life happens around them. Abigail might have a lot against her, but I want her joy to remain.

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Abigail playing with her cousin. Hopefully they will be lifelong friends.

5) The last prayer is a little odd probably but still a very dear prayer to me. I pray for the people in Abigail’s life to be a benefit and support for her. I want to find a doctor that will support us and help us seek the best for Abigail. I want her therapists to continue to love her and help us learn how to help her best. (Thankfully we have been blessed with amazing therapists that have done this so far and I know it will continue!!) I pray that her teachers will help her grow and will be patient with her as they see her potential. I pray for friends to come along in her life and have fun and can socialize with her. I pray these friends can support one another and live each other unconditionally. I pray for Abigail’s best friend to come along and be bosom buddies as Anne of Green Gables would say because everyone needs a bosom buddy.

These are my top five prayers for Abigail. Of course I pray we find answers one day. I pray we find the right school. I even think about Abigail’s future mate, but honestly I don’t know if she will be married right now. She may always be a home body with her mom and dad at this rate. That’s why praying for future things is hard. We just don’t know.

The one thing I don’t think to pray for is healing. I sooo want Abigail to walk one day. I want her to be a normal kid and run around and talk and sing. But there’s nothing wrong with Abigail. She isn’t broken or messed up. Everyday she progresses forward and that’s what I pray for – progress. Quick fixes are not in our future. Could Abigail wake up tomorrow and walk? Yes, that’s a possibility but more likely we will build to that point if she is capable of walking. Abigail’s progress may be slow and frustrating at times. But my goodness, when she learns a new skill it makes you want to get up and do a jig. We celebrate the small victories here and I like that. Yes, we want our daughter to be normal, but I wouldn’t trade this process for the world. Abigail’s disability is not only shaping her into the person she is becoming, it is shaping me into a new person too. So today these are the prayers I pray for Abigail!

What are some prayers that you pray for your children?

 

Our Simple Life

I thought I would share what a day in our lives look like. Of course each day changes and you cannot schedule a toddler every second, but on average this is what we do. I love my little buddy, and we are both going to miss each other when she goes to preschool next year. I think my mama’s heart is not going to be able to handle it. But I know Abigail needs to see more people than just me everyday, and I know that I need to be away from her too. But for now I treasure each day I have to spend with my little sidekick.

I wake up around 8 and wait for someone to start stirring. Abigail is normally up around 8:30 or 9. We are late raisers and I am okay with that. I know one day we will have to change our sleeping patterns but for now it works for us. Abigail is happy in the mornings, and we usually snuggle. She never pees at night so we have a very wet diaper when we go in morning. My mom has always said this will make it easier to potty train and I hope that is the case. We have a long ways to go before potty training can start, but maybe one day that will make it easier.

We go downstairs and fix breakfast for us both. She plays with her toys while I get everything together. I eat yogurt and granola. She eats a scrambled egg and cereal and maybe yogurt if she feels like it. She is usually pretty hungry, so she eats well. From there we snuggle and open the blinds in the front room. I have been trying to get her to learn to pull the cords to give her a job to do each morning. And then we get dressed and ready for the day. I lay her down in her bedroom with toys and music while I get ready and straighten up or put a load of laundry on. Then we get her dressed and that crazy blonde hair brushed the best we can.

Then depending on the day we try to go somewhere each morning. Mornings are Abigail’s best times. On Mondays we have physical therapy. On Tuesday’s is Music Class. On Wednesday’s is speech and occupational therapy. On Thursday’s she stays with grandma while I go to Bible Study. And Friday’s we normally have free so we go to the park or to the grocery store. One way or another we get out of the house for a bit, mostly for mama’s sanity. I like having somewhere to go each day.

We return for lunch and we usually watch TLC while we eat our sandwiches and fruit and goldfish. Then the afternoon fussiness begins. We try to have wiggle time and snuggle time. But at 2 it is nap time. We settle down with a good book or two and then it is off to Mommie and Daddy’s bed for a nap. We have to hold her down still so she does not fall of the bed, but it usually only takes her about 20-30 minutes to fall asleep. Some days I nap with her. Some days I use the hour and a half to clean or blog or just do nothing. It just depends on how motivated I am that day.

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I usually have to wake Abigail up because she would sleep the day away and never go to bed at night if we let her. She is out of it when she gets up. It takes her a good 20-30 minutes of snuggles to finally wake up. Those are some of my favorite minutes of the day. By then, if Daddy has been working all morning, he is home. So it is his turn with Abigail while I get dinner ready and the house straightened again.

We eat together at the table and Daddy normally gets her all fed while I clean up afterwards. She is the slowest little eater but she eats well! In the evenings we try to take a walk whether in the neighborhood or at the local outdoor mall 5 minutes from our house. We do some exercises and just are together as a family, watching TV, tickling, playing, and wiggling.

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Wrestling with Daddy before bath time.

Then before you know it it is bath time and snack time and snuggle time. Around 9:45 or 10 we head to bed. I know that is late but we honestly still are not close to going to sleep yet. This is why we sleep in. I hate the late bedtime but for now this is where we are. If anyone has suggestions about how to get a toddler to sleep faster please let me know! Her therapist and pediatrician have both said this may be a result of her finally gaining freedom and mobility. If you just learned to move you would want to wiggle all the time too. But we are trying to teach her that bedtime is bedtime, and give her tons of time to wiggle during the day. So, at 10 I read her a story or two and then lay down and hold her again. Bedtime takes longer to go to sleep. It normally takes between 45 minutes to an hour and a half. She is usually asleep by 11 or 11:30 and then it is my turn to sleep.

There is not anything exciting about our days. We like the simple life. Of course, days change and we do other things in between the usually stuff. Whether Grandma comes for a new adventure or we go to a doctors appointment that day. Or on days we miss therapy because our therapist cancel, we go to the store or just explore around town. Abigail is pretty chill, so it is easy to take her places. These next few months have lots of new adventures in store as fall festivals approach and then we have a big family wedding coming up. But all in all it is just the three of us living life with each other one day at a time. I love my simple life and I am glad I get to share it with my family!!

happy place